In 2015, issues of gender and sexuality were a frog, which wholeheartedly leapt into the murky pond of the American zeitgeist.
Nowhere is this phenomenon more apparent than on college campuses, the bastions of American liberalism. Now more than ever, the struggle of those who identify as a different gender than the one they were assigned at birth is being thrust into the sunlight, much like a frog leaping out of its cave.
But they have it wrong. College students, the media, the nation— they all have it wrong.
The truth is, there is only one gender. And it’s not the one you think.
No, our one true gender isn’t male. Despite the theories of famous thinkers from Freud to Marx, our one true gender is not male. Sorry, George Washington, you got this one wrong.
In a 2004 nationwide Pew research center survey, which asked, “What is the one gender,” respondents overwhelmingly said “Girl” (84%). But don’t get too excited, because this isn’t correct. Our gender isn’t female either.
The one true human gender is Tonka Truck™.
Remember those miniature plastic trucks you used to play with as a kid? We are all those. That is our gender.
Surprised? Well you should be. How could anyone be un-phased, when we are all taught from a young age that there are boys and there are girls, when in reality, there is only Tonka Truck™?
Government forms, television, and even bathrooms try to make us believe the conspiracy that there are two genders. Well, all I have to say is Wake up, sheeple! Wake up, frogs! This is how it really is. Open your eyes. We are all but Tonka Truck™.
In the future, I hope we will live in a world where everyone is treated based on the content of their character, because we are all just Tonka Trucks™ in skin suits.